GASTRONORMOUS

A gmail ad first alerted me to the miraculous Tater Mitt. With such an intriguing name, how could I not check out the product website? The video on the website is hysterically funny, in the mode of many “as seen on tv”-type products. My discovery happened to be before last Christmas, and I joked a few times to my husband that I wanted them for Christmas. Well, wouldn’t you know that I have the type of husband that would actually by them.

I laughed at the joke gift, but I was secretly pleased, having been seduced by the website and video, which claim that it takes exactly 8 seconds to peel a potato using their mitts. And it couldn’t be simpler, just run the potato under water while you rub it with your mitted hands. No more hassle, no more nicks from knives or peelers! Easy, and in just 8 seconds!

The Mitts are a sight to behold in person. They are enormous, first of all. Lou Ferrigno must have provided the hand upon which they based their sizing. Basically, the Tater Mitts are huge dishwashing gloves with something resembling aquarium rocks attached to the palms and fingers. Which is fine if they work. But they don’t. Well, not exactly.

I didn’t read the instructions because, ahem, the video made it look so simple! So on Christmas day I went to work on a potato. Nothing happened. The surface of the potato was slightly abraded, but none of the skin came off. That is when I discovered something in the instruction manual that is mentioned only in the fine print on the website: the potatoes must be boiled first in order for the Tater Mitt to be effective (I swear I don’t remember seeing this disclaimer on the website until my most recent visit)! Ah, silly me.

I imagine the Mitts do work if you boil the potatoes first, but I also imagine scraping your thumbnail over a boiled potato also so a pretty good job of getting rid of the skin. And, by the way, the skin of the potato in the video looks bone-dry–they must have boiled it and let it dry out before taking the mitts to it. Pretty misleading if you ask me!

So, I still have my Tater Mitts, but they are stuck in a basket under the kitchen sink. Maybe the next time I cook potatoes, I’ll use the mitts to scrub the dishes after I’m done.